It was December when I received a text. His name was Leland Anderson and he was the principal of the RDF International School in Shenzhen, China. He wondered if he could schedule a FaceTime interview with the two of us.
My heart jumped. This is it. I talked to Brian who was also surprised and we scheduled it for the following evening. I was excited and scared and nervous and I remember feeling really cold and shaky the entire time we visited. When the thoughts initially ran wild in my mind, I pictured Brian and I working at the school and the kids going to an international elementary school with kids from all over the world. It would be an experience we could never recreate. I would be able to teach again and have the wonderful experience again of working with the sweet Chinese kids who made me feel so alive.
It was probably 10:00 pm our time and we talked for over an hour. We noticed the BYU flag hanging in his office and he sat next to an assistant of some kind who listened in and asked just a question or two. The very first thing he said was, "There isn't an elementary school in the area, so you'd have to homeschool your children." This was totally not what I had pictured. But instantly, I thought, "I can do that." In coming weeks I would have moments of sadness - maybe even anger sometimes - when I realized that this wouldn't work out for me the way I had pictured it. Of course, those feelings are long gone and didn't last long, but they were absolutely part of the process for me. He asked us all about our teaching background and I personally had a hard time coming up with some of my answers, as I haven't taught in almost a decade. But at the same time, my ideas and beliefs came back to me. Brian explained how this school would be pretty much the opposite of the school where he currently works. The students in China are trying to get accepted to Ivy League schools, whereas the students are Summit are often the first in their family to even graduate high school. I think Brian is more than qualified and would be an asset to any school. Leland was very complimentary and kind and kept saying, "If we offer you the position" and we talked and asked questions as if this was going to happen. At this point, Brian still thought so many hoops would have to be jumped through for this far-fetched idea to come through. The conversation ended well and within the week the HR guy from the school called for a follow-up interview. It was short and he asked us how much money we expected to make. That was a weird and hard question - we felt like we were put in a tricky spot but knew that we needed to make it work financially.
During the coming weeks, I spoke often with Petra and hashed out details. She and I would talk numbers and figure out exactly what we needed to make this happen. Finances were Brian's biggest worry. Neither of us felt comfortable going to debt to do this. Part of the deal is the the school would fly our entire family over there and back as well as pay for housing and some of the bills. I crunched numbers night after night and emailed back and forth with a woman who is teaching there and has a family our size. She told me their budget, line by line, and I worked out ours. If we rented out our home, then we could make it work. I had the number written on the top of the paper. The number that we needed to realistically consider it.
Leland called in January and offered Brian a job. And wouldn't you know - he offered him the exact number that I had written on the top of my page. We won't come home with extra, but with this we can make it happen. Brian was visibly shaken and put his hand on his face after he hung up the phone. We had a decision to make. Before if was just a what if? Now it was a real option. Brian wasn't committed yet.
Over the weeks prior to this we talked and talked about the what ifs and how would this work and played out all the scenarios in our minds. We talked about fun things and extra things we could do and how much the kids would learn. We talked about flying to Taiwan to see his mission. We talked about walking on the Great Wall and seeing the rolling mountains in Guilin. We talked about learning ping pong and badminton and him speaking in Chinese again. We talked about his job here and could he get a leave of absence and what would he do when he got home. We talked about the kids sports and friends they would miss. We talked about scary food and wondered if the kids would eat it. We talked about walking away from it all and the simplicity that we could find. We talked about what we'd need to chance here at home if we didn't end up going. We talked about living big and taking chances in life. We talked about bringing the focus back to our family and how this could be one way to really reign in the craziness that we are involved in right now. We talked about it all. Over and over again. Not in an exhausting way, but in a thoughtful, thinking, prayerful way. We went to the temple. He didn't want to be mad at me for 11 months if I made him go. I didn't want to be mad at him for 11 months if he didn't try. So we kept thinking. Is this a good, right decision for us right now?
I suggested we talk to his dad. He's got a logical but feeling brain. Brian trusts him. I trust him. We went to dinner with them one night and had them so concerned when we said we wanted "to talk." That's probably never good for a parent to hear their kid say that.... We came back and sent the kids away (they still had no idea of what was going on) and told them of the opportunity here in our family room. Their first reaction was that they'd miss us. But when I pressed to ask him what he thought, I'll never forget what he said. He said, "I say take the adventure. Time is short." He reminded us of the time he took the family on a trip and saved $30 on a hotel with no pool. He always regrets not paying the extra and getting the pool.
I decided to let Brian sit with it and not say anything for a bit. Let him come up with whatever he came up with on his own. I had told him all of my thoughts. There was nothing more to say. He knew where I stood and what I wanted to do. Just a few days later we were talking on the phone while he was at work. I brought it up and asked him what he had been thinking about it. His response: "I say we pack our bags and fly to China." And that was that.
No comments:
Post a Comment